No more Mr Reluctant-Blogger!

Hello everyone…

I’ll put my hands up from the start and admit that it’s been a long time since my last post. I wish I could say that I’ve had too many things happening [and I have] but the sad truth is that I’ve just been struggling to commit words to paper lately. Lethargy has quite settled in over the last month and I feel like I’m living inside a little bubble that consists of a perfect balance of 'waking up-getting angry on the tube-working-getting angry on the tube-crashing on my sofa-going to sleep'.

Well, I’m tired of that and I’ve decided to put a stop to it. I’ve made some major decisions [one of which you’ll hear about a lot in the next few blogs!] and I’m taking control of my life again. The treatment has been setting the rules of the game for a while but I’m not playing ball anymore. So, once again, I promise to keep the blog updated in the weeks to come and thanks to those who keep coming back to the blog even though there’s been nothing new to read lately.

The monthly update on my health is not that different from the last few blogs: Tired, tired and tired. Getting out of bed every morning is a big battle and that’s a battle I only win when I get back into bed at night. Apart from that, I think I’ve been coping alright with everything that’s been happening and if that changes, you’ll all hear about it!

I’m working on the big news that will come probably in the next post and please come back for it because, rest assured, I’m going to need all the help and support that you can give me!

In the meantime, please check this out and show your support. Every little helps! Many thanks…

See you next week!

Heppy B-day!

I’ve never been in a fight. Ok, that’s not exactly true. I’ve been punched a couple of times but they don’t qualify as fights because I was either too confused or too restrained in order to respond. So, I feel I can say I’ve never been in a fight.

However, if I had ever been in a fight with 5 big, strong men who proceeded to beat the fear of life into my bones and knocked me out and then when waking up I realised how extensive the kicking was, I think I would’ve felt exactly how I felt when I woke up the day after my last post.

It seems that posting on this blog acts as a harbinger for future aches and my last post fulfilled its Delphic purpose wonderfully. I mentioned that I was still aching, being extremely tired and worrying about possibly being at the doors of a mood swing but then I candidly said that I hoped ‘my fears were unfounded’. Well, they weren’t unfounded, they were just misread.

The achiness of my body, the tiredness and the general feeling of ‘urgh’ have just turned the volume up and over the last few days [and even as I write this] I’ve been feeling like I have been hit by a big truck and this just seems to be a progression of the side effects I’ve been experiencing ever since I started my treatment. I’ve been quite lucky so far by avoiding the more horrible of the side effects but I’m starting to realise that the ones I’m actually experiencing are pretty tough as well. I don’t like complaining too much but, at the moment, I just want to say ‘ouch’!

Ok, I’ve already complained so let’s turn to positive things. Feeling crappy hasn’t stopped me from going to work, seeing family and the sort so I’m happy that the painful lethargy is not crippling the limited social life I’ve got at the moment.

My 26th birthday is on Friday [incidentally, it happens to be my partner's bday too so happy bday R... Love you] and, even though I’ve never been a ‘let’s-celebrate-my-birthday’ kind of person, I’m planning to make this one count because, after all, I’m a lucky man and I’m happy to add another year to my life.

So, here’s to a long and fruitful life and we’ll talk next week!

Peace

The Needle Has Landed!

I’ve been back from holiday for a whole, long week now. For those interested, it was amazing and it was great to have the opportunity to relax and not worry about anything whilst away. It was helpful to just enjoy a little break from everything and I felt a lot better for it.

I had to take my drugs on holiday with me and I was a bit concerned that trying to take a needle into the plane would be a bit of an ordeal. I had letters from my doctors confirming that I was undergoing treatment and that the needle’s purpose wasn’t malevolent in any shape or form. However, I didn’t have to worry about that at all as the bag went through check in without any problems and the needle even made the trip back home [as it needs to be disposed of in an appropriate manner] without any inconveniences whatsoever. So that was very good!

Now, back in the real world, I had my monthly appointment on Friday and it was, as it’s becoming the rule, a mix of good news and not-so-good news. The good news: My blood levels are all normal, my liver function is fluctuating but it’s still within reasonable levels under the circumstances, my body is reacting well to treatment and I now have to see the doctor in three months time [with a few blood tests along the way]. The bad news: As was expected, the interferon has not helped at all with my Hep B and it is now a distinct reality that at the end of this treatment [regardless of whether the interferon actually helps me rid myself of the Hep C virus], I will have to start yet another treatment for the Hep B. This treatment will be ‘very expensive’ apparently and I’ll have to apply for it on ‘compassionate grounds’ to see if I can get it subsidised by the NHS. So, as you can see, a mixture of good news and not-so-good news.

Anyway, I guess we’ll cross that bridge when we get there. In the meantime, I’m being very good with my current treatment and it seems to be working very well. The doctor is very happy with the progress and it all seems very positive overall.

On a personal level, I’m still as exhausted as I’ve been for the last three months and my muscles still ache all over but I’m still coping well with that. The people close to me have started to ask lately whether I’m ok [I’ve felt ok] so I’m hoping I’ve just been having a few days off and this is not the start of undesirable mood swings that I haven’t noticed. Hopefully that’s not it and I’ll be posting next week that my fears were unfounded.

Ok, I think I’ve taken enough of your time now. I’m signing off here but if you want to find out more, get in touch.

Peace!

Results are in!

11 injections in! That’s where I am at the moment! That means I’m kicking off week 11 of my treatment! Woo hoo… Look at me!

Ok, enough of that. Hehe…

You might notice I’m a bit more cheerful than usual. Why is that I hear you asking? Well, I found out at the end of last week that blood tests taken 7 weeks into my treatment showed that the viral load for the Hep C had more than halved in my system. That means that my liver is having to work half as hard as it normally would have to. In other words, the treatment that’s sucking the energy out of my body is also, thankfully, helping me to rid myself of Hepatitis C! In health terms, I’m very, very happy.

Having said that, and being a natural-born cynic, I’m taking the results with a pinch of salt. The good news: The treatment is working, I’ve got 37 weeks to go and, hopefully, at the end of it, I’ll be free from Hep C. I don’t know about you but I think that’s pretty good news. The flip side of that is that I’ve got a long way to go and my body is not fighting your salt-of-the-earth cold. I’ve already believed once I got rid of this so, understandably I hope, I’m taking the news with happiness but a fair share of trepidation.

Just for the record, I’ve tried writing this post a few times over the last week but it’s proven to be quite tricky. My heart is being overrun by conflicting feelings and it’s quite confusing being very happy and very concerned at the same time. I’m off to sunny Greece with my beautiful partner for a week so hopefully by the time I get back, my feelings and thoughts on this will be clearer.

In the meantime, let’s go all out and join the part of me that’s ecstatic and enjoying the good news. Woo hoo…

As for the update on my health status, my white blood cells levels have fallen a bit but nothing to worry about, I’ve put on a bit of weight and I’m still very tired but coping. All in all, a good week!

You know the drill, drop us a line if you want to know a bit more but don’t expect a prompt response because I’m on holiday!

See you all in a bit…

Story Of A Broken Toe

As many of you might have noticed already, it's been over four weeks since my last post. I promised when I started this blog that I would update it weekly and that, overall, I would take good care of it. However, I didn't take into account how exhausting my treatment would be when coupled with unforeseen complications [more on this in a bit] and the last few weeks have just proven to be a bit too much for me and I didn't feel like updating the blog at all. I even considered scrapping the whole thing a week ago when, after falling victim to an over-sensitised feeling of ennui, I felt that there really was no point in maintaining this blog since only a couple of people seemed to be really interested in it, noticing the unnatural lack of updating. Self-pity is not one of my favourite traits, hence that wasn't one of my proudest moments it must be said! Now, having remembered that this blog wasn't set up for the masses but for those people interested in knowing how this silly boy is doing, collecting useful info in a nice friendly way and for me to be able to chronicle this year of my life, I found my fingers itchy at work, desperate to write a new post for the blog.

So, I suppose I should start by explaining what gave rise to this period of over-the-top melancholy and like all good stories, it starts with a broken bone*! The day after my last post, on a rare mid-week night out, I broke a toe. It was a dramatic break too. Blood everywhere, toenails hanging by quite literally just a thread and the sort. The incident itself is a story that, for the purposes of this blog, is too long and not-wholly-relevant so it won't be included here, but you can read about it if you want to by clicking 'A Tale Of Toe Cities'.

So, after spending a good 3 hours in A & E ['Emergency Room' for those reading outside Britain] that night, feeling quite a lot of pain, stressing over blood spillages [see 'A Tale Of Toe Cities'] and getting home after 4am in the morning, I took stock of the situation and it wasn't good. I had to have a whole week of antibiotics [on top of my interferon treatment], limp all over the place [exerting even more effort on an already-exhausted body] and come to the realisation that, in spite of acting like nothing was happening in my life, I needed to be more careful with my health. It was a very tiring experience overall. I guess I'm only saying all this to try and trick you into liking me and overlook the fact that, through my own stupidity, I put my body through a lot of unnecessary strain.

I won't keep going on about broken toes anymore but instead I'll do what this blog is supposed to do and tell you how my Hep treatment is going. I'm still very tired but I've accepted that this might be the case for the next 40 weeks [Can you believe I've already gone through 8 weeks of treatment?] so I'm finding ways to just get used to it. I'm about to start going to the gym, playing football again and get on with my writing [i.e. Start writing!]. In short, just assimilate tiredness into my life and get on with it. Probably easier said than done but I guess we'll find out.

Apart from that and the bout of melancholy [already discussed at length! I promise I'll stop now] everything else is going fine. So, I'm pretty happy still and trying to stay as positive as possible.
Just to reiterate that I haven't forgotten about the blog, I will post a few interesting links I've come across over the last three weeks in the next few days.

And, finally, no matter what, I'll be posting next week without fail. So, welcome back and drop me a line if you want to!

*Disclaimer: I know of no great stories that start with broken bones!

For whom the bell tolls...

I live in a beautiful place in London, not that far from a very old clocktower that gives our neighbourhood a nice village-y feel where people come to bring up kids and have a nice, easy time on Sunday mornings. I love it!

However, as an insomniac, the clocktower plays the part of a torturer whenever I can't get to sleep at night. And never has that been so true as this week. Before my treatment started, a couple of sleepless nights were annoying but I could cope with it. This week, after a few weeks of tiredness, a night of sleeplesness resulted in me missing a day of work and feeling like I just wanted to bury my head in the ground and sleep for weeks on end. It was very hard.

Basically, what I'm trying to say is that it was a dificult week. Being tired all the time is becoming increasingly wearing as time goes by. I've been trying to tell you that it's not a horrible side effect but, as side effects go, tiredness is difficult. I'm starting to hate it!

That on the left is the weekly dose of drugs that are making me feel like this every week. I've had a full-on weekend [Saturday: My parent's 28th Wedding Anniversary! [Well done guys!], Sunday: Colombia's Independence Day] so this week might be hard as well. But I'll complain about that one next Sunday.

See you then!

Introducing Mr Billy-No-Weekends!

Remember when I merrily mentioned during the first week of my treatment that I was just feeling a little bit tired? And then when I worriedly mentioned last week that the tiredness and achiness remained? Well, three weeks in, I'm physically and emotionally drained! As a very active 25-year-old, suddenly facing waking up in the mornings being just as tired as I was when I went to bed and knowing that I've got a long day in front of me, it's e-x-h-a-u-s-t-i-n-g! It's pretty much like taking the juice away from the duracell bunny! Mean!

Anyway, it just means that by Friday evenings [the night of the injection] I'm ready for a wild weekend of crashing on my sofa looking like your stereotypical dope-head without the aid of recreational drugs! A barrel of laughs as you can imagine... Thankfully, my partner is an angel and life is not as bad as it could be.

Having got that off my chest, everything else is alright. The tiredness is an annoying side effect but one that relaxing under the sun will sort out nicely. I'm still very positive and I'm feeling healthy. I'm eating more than normal [I've gained a couple of kilos] and even my sleeping patterns are starting to resemble a normal person's fare.

That's my weekly update and if you want to know a bit more, you know the deal, drop me a line!

See you